Arranged marriages aren't seeming so bad

So I keep seeing all these loved up couples, and I just keep thinking "I want that!"

And I wondered why I can't have that.

But it's obvious, when you think about it.

I never go for the safe guys.

I mean, look at Michael. I've been after him for like a year, and look where that's got me. No-fucking-where. He's the least safe person, in the idea that I never knew where I stood with him, and that I always put up with so much shit from him. And now I'm single, and he has a girlfriend, who isn't me.

And before him, Paav. I thought he was perfect. We were engaged for fuck's sake. That one seemed so safe to me back then. And he cheated on me. Broke my heart; he was the first person to do so. We're friends now though, which isn't too bad.

But, looking back, neither of my two loves were actually any good for me.

And I was thinking, my family knows what's best for me...Something that I clearly don't yet. Maybe if I want a successful relationship, they should pick the guy for me...I know for certain, they would never have picked Michael or Paav for me.

Family arranging a marriage for you, has never seemed like such a good idea to me, as it is right now...

x x